Still.

Ok, I will admit it.  I have been beyond grumpy lately.  I seem to have misplaced all of my joy.  For several weeks now, I have grumbled through my daily activities - from morning til night a "funky grump" has weighed on my soul.   Honestly, I have been perplexed as to the source of my "grumpitude".

This morning I listened as my sweet husband prayed over me.  He covered every area of my life - health, relationships, marriage, work.  There was nothing new about this experience as he prays for me all the time.  But, for some reason, his words seemed to lodge themselves in my mind this morning.  Hours later, I was still thinking about the wonderful blessing of having a husband who prays for me and a savior who hears and answers prayers.

As the hours crept by today, I started focusing on the "little blessings" in my life.  It didn't take me long to realize that the blessings in my life could hardly be counted as "little".  I am freakishly blessed.  Crazy things happen to me all the time.  Things that can only be explained by giving God the glory.

I glanced down at the bracelets on my arm and read the scriptures inscribed on them. "Never will I leave you or forsake you."  "Be still and know that I am God." Such comforting words.  Such truth.  Such conviction.

In the midst of my month of grump, my precious savior was there.  He knew how chaotic my schedule had been.  He knew that laundry was piling up.  He knew about every middle school project waiting to be completed.  He knew about overdue library books.  He knew that there were reports to write, email in need of response, lessons to write, PowerPoints to create, and books to read.  He knew.  He Knew.  HE KNEW.

I 'm guessing that He was still.  I'm guessing that He hoped I would realize how big He is - how much control He has.  I'm guessing He was waiting until I would remember to be still and KNOW.

The grumpy fog lifted when I was still.  I was quiet.  I was in awe of my Lord.  I praised Him.  I thanked Him.  I reflected on answered prayers.  I remembered His grace.

Even as I type tonight, tears fill my eyes.  He knows me.  He loves me.  He redeemed me.  I'm  overwhelmed at what that actually means.

Tonight I will sit here in the quiet and rest in the arms of my savior.  Thankful for grace - free from grump - blessed.